*~Reply~*

The ongoing theme of my life these days
Relies upon waiting...waiting...what for?
I don't know enough about you anymore.
This was always a dream I shouldn't chase...

My heart feels constricted but I can't cry.
When did I start caring so much only for you?
Why did it bother me, that thing you do...
I know you read everything but there's no reply.

My hands will still tremble when you come near
But it's becoming clear that we won't meet...
When you finally do reply, I can't just delete-
I always reply and wait for yours, right here.

You humor me by replying occasionally
But my hopes are raised only to be brought down.
You don't know how tightly my heart is bound.
Do you do this to me intentionally?

These feelings should have expired long ago.
I don't understand why I have to keep you close.
I don't know why the ones I love hurt me the most.
Are you subconsciously or knowingly cold?

Why won't you reply?
Why can't I cry


*~This Feeling...~*

What do you call that feeling...
How do you describe such discomfort?
It can't be the same as dying...
Yet something within seems to hurt.

What do you call this idleness...
How do you regain control of your mind?
I can't have returned to this blindness
When I was so ready to leave you behind.

What meaning is there in the words...
The messages you seem to reply reluctantly?
Maybe this self-induced pain is absurd
But who can blame an artist's own tragedy?

Is there a name, a term for this feeling...
An overflowing of emotions locked up inside?
After spending so much time self denying
When I need it the most, I'm unable to cry.

My eyes forget, the tears will be trapped forever.
What name do you give to this form of torture?

♫~Elaine~♫