Elaine 的个人资料♫~°~♪~°~Melodic Interval...照片日志列表更多  |  工具 帮助 |
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1月29日 Stab my heart and another untitled poemGo ahead and take a stab at my heart.
Don't be scared, just go ahead and stab
At my diamond heart.
How your blades seem so much less sharp
Now that I'm taking a stand and surpass
Your daggers and darts.
When you decide to fall in love with me
You'll be the only one doing the falling.
There's no way I'm gonna be falling for you again.
Didn't you wonder how hurt I would be?
You'll see when you fall for me.
You couldn't possibly hurt me more now.
I see your confidence has been shaken
Bye the strength that I show.
untitled
If I hung a "vacant" sign over my heart
Would you finally see what I'm missing?
If I give up trying to smile in your presence
Would you realize how much I've been hurting?
There's nothing wrong with me.
Just leave me alone for awhile.
I'm sure I'll be fine after I think things through.
How long has it been
Since I've been in denial.
I'm ready to accept what I know is true.
Nothing short of death could bring you here to me.
At least I can appreciate how things used to be.
It was never really love if it's so easy for you to leave.
I forgive you completely
But I can't talk to you with a smile.
Your heart changed and there's nothing I can do.
If I can show you that I'm happy now
Would you feel better about leaving me?
If I tell you not to leave me alone again
Would you come back and stay with me?
1月19日 don't have titles yet...Untitled:
Thank goodness for the rain
Which melts away all the snow.
I feel almost as though
My life has been unfrozen
And I can dream of love again.
Rain is unstoppable; so are tears
But life just happens, so go with the flow.
I've got scars to show
They're reminders of a lesson:
I can't always hide from my fears.
A fake smile slowly begins to shine
As I embrace the courage to want to know.
Now I can let him go,
Just happy to have met him
And I can tell him sincerely that I'll be fine.
The shell of snow and ice
Hides the life from below.
It's only another sleeping soul.
Water's always changing,
Regenerated and renewed we'll arise.
But for now
Just watch the tears falling
Deep into the night
Look through my eyes
See the beautifully blurring lights...
snipets....fragments, incomplete parts of poems i've written....
1.
He kills my heart without even caring
But a simple apology and i easily forgive him.
He seems to forget me so conveniently
Though he swears he does so unintentionally.
I can predict all the excuses I think he'll use.
He'll pass me by again, he'll keep walking through.
2.
The freezing rain
Seems to numb my pain.
A broken chain...
My heart reaches out in vain.
A sleepless night
No comforting light
You're out of sight
It doesn't feel right...
Ok, thats all for now.....ciao
1月15日 Laws lolHey guys, these were pretty funny :P enjoy!
The probability of a young man meeting with
a desirable and receptive young female increases by pyramidal progression when he is already in the company of: (1) a date, (2) his wife, (3) a better looking and richer male friend. Arthur's First Law of Love: People to whom you are attracted
inevitably think you remind them of someone else. Arthur's Second Law of Love: The love letter you finally got the
courage to send will be dalayed in the mail long enough for you to make a fool of yourself in person. Anvari's Law of Homework: A homework doesn't get created or destroyed,
but can be converted from one form to another. Ballance's Law of Relativity: How long a minute is depends on
which side of the bathroom door you're on. Anthony's Law of Force: Don't force it; get a larger hammer.
Baruch's Observation: If all you have is a hammer, everything
looks like a nail. Bocklage's Law: He who laughs last probably didn't get the joke.
Cafeteria Law: The item you had your eye on the minute you
walked in will be taken by the person in front of you. Chisholm's First Corollary: If you do something that you are
sure will meet with everybody's approval, somebody won't like it. Chisholm's Second Corollary: If you explain so clearly that
nobody can misunderstand, somebody will. Collin's Conference Principle: The speaker with the most
monotonous voice speaks after the big meal. Davis's Law: If a headline ends in a question mark, the answer
is "no". Drazen's Law of Restitution: The time it takes to rectify a
situation is inversely proportional to the time it took to do the damage. Example: It takes longer to glue a vase together than to break one. Dykstra's Law: Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
Edelstein's Advice: Don't worry about what other people think of
you -- they're too busy worrying about what you think of them. Evans's and Bjorn's Law: No matter what goes wrong, there is
always somebody who knew it would. The Extended Murphy's Law: If a series of events can go wrong,
it will do so in the worst possible sequence. Fahnestock's Rule for Failure: If at first you don't succeed,
destroy all evidence that you tried. Felson's Law: To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to
steal from many is research. Ferguson's Precept: A crisis is when you can't say "let's forget
the whole thing." Fifth Law of Applied Terror: If you are given an open-book exam,
you will forget your book. Corollary: If you are given a take-home exam, you will forget where you live. Finagle's Sixth Rule: Do not believe in miracles -- rely on
them. Finagle's Eight Rule: Teamwork is essential . . . it allows you
to blame someone else. First Law of Applied Terror: When reviewing your notes before an
exam, the most important ones will be illegible. First Law of Class Scheduling: Class schedules are designed so
that every student will have time to waste between classes. 1月13日 Frostbittenhey I wrote this poem late last night, like I write most of my poems....I quite like it but, as always, the audience is the real judge right?
Frostbitten
A frostbitten heart can no longer melt.
No mere words, no mere actions.
If neither happiness nor sadness, what is felt?
A frostbitten soul can no longer be reached.
She dwells within shadows of the sanctuary.
No music remains in her cold sunless beach.
Tears begin their descent to an impossible journey.
Slowly they crystallize against skin colder than ice.
There is no warmth that can be felt from apology.
To her ears she barely hears the meaningless, "Sorry."
A frostbitten life is her new found reality.
She sees without real acknowledgement.
Everything from now on she'll go through numbly.
She survived the windchill, ice, and rain
But what's left of her now?
She knows no emotion, she knows no pain.
She doesn't know if she's sane or insane.
*~Elaine~*
so....what do you think? 1月12日 my poems written from Dec. 28th 2006 till...um now I guess :DHey so I've been writing quite frequently but sometimes I don't like what I wrote so I haven't posted the poems in my space. Also, lots of things were going on and I didn't have the energy to type it out. So anyway, I'm still tired and don't have much energy but I feel I should put them up here....just a feeling....so...ta-da!
untitled (lack of inspiration?)
The words all swirl around in my head
Waiting to be strung into verse
But why do I feel so inarticulate now?
Why can't I work again with those words?
I stood half the day before a blank canvas
Hesitating to pick up my paintbrush
Because i don't know what I want anymore
My mind becomes more empty as I panic and rush.
I can't recall my most favourite songs
Confusing the lyrics and melodies.
How strange, it's like I'm forgetting the reasons
Please send me a muse as I fall to my knees.
If once again my heart gets broken,
Then I'll accept my fate which has been spoken.
Self-imposed Restriction
No one really knows me
There's always something I need to hide.
If I let everything come out
I'd have no secrets left inside.
I try to only show the goodness
While my pain hangs around.
When it gets to be too much to handle
I go to someplace where I can't be found.
There is where I drop my act of happiness.
It's the place where rain always pours.
There's no way in once I bar the doors.
And so, I am free to be only me
Free to let my tears dance with the rain.
I'm soaking wet and the cold numbs the pain.
It's an ironic kind of comfort
But for now it's all I've got.
Lemons
Long ago we planted a tree
Everyday we'd watch it grow taller
Many nights we'd camp outside
Only us two, when we were smaller
Now we've all grown up
Sweetness turned sour.
(this one is different from my other poems....i'm not really sure what to think of it....)
At the caravanserai they met.
Two strangeers of lands far apart.
She wore a veil and bands of gold.
His tunic was worn out and older than old.
As they gathered for a hearty feast
Their eyes were drawn to each other.
The women gathered for their dance
And he willingly let her pull him into a trance.
Jingling bracelets, a drum, and a flute-
The most beautiful sound in this place of nowhere.
To live a life so free and joyful,
One forgets past journeys which were so fearful.
What they wouldn't give to have more time,
More silent moments by the gypsy's fire
But when dawn arrives the journey recommences.
The love so true will only remain in remembrance....
Until one day, someday in another life
Another time and point in space....
Appearances and status may change
But one day true love will be husband and wife.
alright, the following are three haikus inspired after I watched the sailor moon drama which, by the way was not as cheesey as i originally thought. It's actually quite good, very soap opera/drama-like....so if you haven't seen it, these three haikus are just funny without the context....
(Jupiter)
Don't have to be alone.
My friend the turtle-lover will be
True and always with me.
(Nephrite nb. I know this one doesn't really follow the 5-7-5 rule)
Couldn't stop eating your cookies,
Although they were burnt and really nasty,
Because they were for me.
(Mercury)
You ate my burnt cookies
Again and again you reached for more.
Can't stop laughing at you.
sooooooo thats it for now....enjoy
love,
Elaine....
1月7日 funny stuffMy first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it. The job was only so-so anyhow. Next I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was exhausting. I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it. I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard. My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't note worthy. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience. Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried, but I just didn't fit in. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income. I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit, because it was always the same old grind. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, until I realized there was no future in it. just something i found randomly lol.....
oh and go to this website: http://users.telenet.be/Besthumorsite/Videos/Videos.htm and watch Christmas Musician, and Mozart. its sooo cool. and the other videos are funny too lol
that will be all.
oh tomorrow i'm going back to telus to get a new phone because MY NEW PHONE IS NOT FREAKIN WORKING.
Ttyl :D 1月4日 Lost WithinLost Within
I cling to an antique compass,
As if it could help, As if it could suddenly point the way. My way to…where? To what? My mind’s eye cannot see across The wasteland of my life, nor Can it penetrate the miasma of mismapped thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts that spark only to sputter out Leaving me helpless in their darkness. I cannot think. Such a simple thing, really, to think. The North Star has been obscured By the fog, heavy and thick, Oozing across the valley of my mind. The only thing I feel Is the cold steel of a broken compass That can neither point to true north Nor lead me safely home. It is said the physically lost oft wander in circles. My mind circles around and around on itself, A sinking spiral, a bottomless void Pulling me ever deeper into oblivion-- Plummeting within myself no longer with the energy To flail or fight. At least down is a direction. this is exactly how I feel right now...I found this poem on writing.com its by someone who calls themself..."fyn-Check out my contest!"... 1月3日 Thanks Holly lol Aupair?lol Holly your comment made me laugh and it felt good to know that your parents and grandma liked my flower thing lol. I have no idea what an AUPAIR is....but i'm assuming thats a person who goes to italy and lives with a family while teaching the kids english and you get spending money too! That sounds fun but I'm almost 100% sure I want to go into architecture. The main reason I want to go to italy is really to see the architecture I realized lol. You know, when I was younger, I had a wish to be able to see what everyone's houses looked like, inside and out. Mostly inside though lol. I think I can handle the calculus if I start now... perhaps I should read "Calculus for Dummies" or "Calculus the Easy Way" It's probably to my benefit....I saw those in the uvic bookstore today lol I went to the art gallery today and I saw the doll house display and it was so amazing. I can't remember the name of the person who built it but it was amazing. There were mirrors and real light fixtures and the details were amazing too! In one room there was a grand piano and on a desk there was a sketchbook with tiny little drawings and super thin pencils. I couldn't believe how much detail there was! And I read that the roof was made from an organ in some place that was taken down. Oh in another room, there was a bathroom attached but the wall covers the sink part. However, because there's a mirror it reflects the rest of the bathroom. It was so cool. So Noah says he doesnt see me as an architect ( he sees me as an anime artist....) but I'm starting to believe that maybe going to Dalhousie would be the right move for me. I just have to finish all my music stuff...hopefully I'll pass my ARCT in august...hopefully I'll pass counterpoint 4 and the written part of piano pedagogy in may....hopefully I'll pass the viva voce part of piano pedagogy in june....and hopefully i'll pass history 5 at the end of this year in December....anyway I've been having trouble sleeping these days...it sucks.....i feel sorry for anyone who has insomnia cuz i lay in bed for an hour completely awake the past few days and i could not fall asleep.... last night i tried counting backwards from 100 and yea...i had problems lol i'd be counting backwards but then i'd forget i'm counting backwards so i counted forward again....eventually I fell asleep but then i had to wake up for school....i haven't gotten up so early in a looooonnnnggg time.....
First day of school was good though. My english class room is really small....my italian classroom is beside last semesters classroom....and we had to talk for 15 minutes in italian lol it was a good review....me and my friend didn't know what to say lol.
Ya so everyone should go see the Baroque show at the Art Gallery of Greater Victoria on Moss St. which is off Fort st. The paintings are lovely, HUGE! and beautiful frames! AND there's baroque furniture and costumes too. there was this one set of drawers which were painted kind of chinese style and oh my goodness it was breathtaking...i stood there with my mouth hanging open lol It's only 10 bucks for students and it's totally worth it. Plus there are other exhibits going on but the Baroque show is special :D
Anyway....I think I've said enough....ciao :) I'm feeling a bit better about myself now. My mom hasn't yelled at me for wanting to go to architecture school yet....perhaps thats a good sign? 1月2日 Architect? or Graphic Designer/Piano teacher....hmm...or something else....So I'm thinking of going to an Architecture school at Dalhousie University in Halifax. I'm thinking that would be a better move for my future career...so I have to complete two years at uvic and then go to Dalhousie for two year Bachelor of Environmental Design and another two years for Masters of Architecture. then I have to do 3 years of internship before I become a licensed architect....It's the best program I've found so far. It takes 4 years and has integrated co-op so i can practice. I actually couldn't sleep last night...spent about an hour just lying awake thinking about what it would be like if i were to go to architecture school....thinking if i want to finish my Bachelor of Fine Arts degree first and then go....but then i'd be like....28 when i become licensed....also...i have to take calculus.....
Or i can stick to my original plan and go into graphic design...i could always teach piano on the side if i can't find a job....
I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO....
I'm also kinda scared at the thought of leaving home for 4 years or more...i'll miss my room...and friends....and eventually i'd miss my family too....its scary but exciting at the same time...i don't know how to choose....
If i go the architecture route, my parent's and relative would be happier probably and I'd be happier because they wouldn't be looking down on me like they are at the moment. I can hardly stand it....seriously who has heard of parents who don't encourage their kids? I showed my parents the painting i did for my grandma's bday present yesterday and I was so proud of it because it was done in chinese ink and I don't have lots of experience with the medium. I just wanted them to say "wow! it's so pretty! the panda's look so good!" but all my mom said was "you forgot to write your name" and my dad was just like "mm" and nodded.
My aunt and uncle who are both accountants look down on me too. They joke that I'll be an artist and starve. I showed them my assignment for art correspondence which had the word "broken". I had to design it and I was really really proud of it. My uncle looked at it and was like "oh beautiful, you'll make a lot of money doing this" in the most sarcastic voice i ever heard. I almost cried. then my mom looks at me and laughs. I couldn't smile.
I'M UNDER SO MUCH STRESS i can't communicate to my parents at all. My grandma is getting around it though. She told my mom that she should let me go to Italy if i have to go because it would help my career.
yea....I'm almost 100% sure I want to go to the architecture school but i should probably see a counsellor...academic advisor...
anyway i have to go to sleep now...school tomorrow....i told myself i was going to sleep at 9:30 and then i extended to 10:30 and now its 11:40.....help me if you have some advice or whatever....I'm kinda lost....i have problems....ugh....
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